Invader Zim's Sing-Along Blog
by Journal Sketch
Summary: Follow Zim in his "amazing" blog, filled with violence, emotions about people (gasp!), and yep! You guessed it! SINGING!
1. Skool Day

**Hello guys! Once again, I'm making another Zim x Mabel shipfic! Well...ish. Anyways, I just (once again) want to apologize for making all of these new stories, and not keeping track of my other ones. I JUST HAVE TO SHARE THESE IDEAS, you know?**

**Okay, this whole story is a parody of Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog (my favorite musical), and if you haven't heard of it...just know the ending isn't exactly happy. Enjoy the fanfic!**

"MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAA!" laughed "Invader" Zim maniacally. For a while now, he had been doing a blog for the fellow Irkens to look at-especially the Tallest. Ever since he had set up his blog, he had been getting lots of messages from others.

"Invader Zim here. That was a pretty impressive laugh, no? The humans practically TREMBLE WITH FEAR just by hearing my amazing laugh! Also, I have a new weapon that I'm working on-my freeze ray. With it, I will soon CONQUER THIS STINKING PLANET OF DIRT!" The alien bragged. He then remembered what he was making this video for.

"Ah, yes, back to the blog. There have been several messages that I have received, and I'm here to reply to some of them. Computer!"

The computer sighed in annoyance.

"Yes?"

"Open up the messages that I have received on my blog." the computer did so, and Zim grinned. He began to read some of them **(A/N: BTW I'm just making up all of these fake usernames...okay well some of them anyways)**:

"This one is from Raven Soul:

_Hey Zim! I'm actually writing this to ask you-WHERE'S MY MONEYS THAT YOU PROMISED ME? Huh? Huh? You know who I am, mister!_" Zim scanned the message once more, then he gave a relaxed smile.

"Hold on for a second _Raven Soul_." Zim walked out of the room, and came back with a bag full of liquid.

"Behold! Your moneys! Of course, it did all melt because of one of my latest weapons...which got destroyed because of that _filthy human Dib_! But, eh, I'm sure that you can put it back together somehow or something. ONTO THE NEXT MESSAGE! Eh-em. This one is from Invaderzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz Rule:

_I see that you didn't show up at the park to face me, Zim. What, were you too chicken or something?" _Zim rolled his eyes.

"You are of no importance to me, Invaderzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz Rule. My real arch enemy is Dib! Unless..." Zim checked to make sure that the big-headed boy wasn't watching his blog, and thank goodness he wasn't. Zim made out a sigh of relief.

"Okay then! Here's one from SybalusKincaidIII:

_Long time watching, first time writing..._blah blah blah," Zim skipped through most of the huge introductory stuff.

"_You always say on your blog that you will show her that you are a true villain. Who is "her," and does she even know that you're..._" Zim stopped reading and stared at the wall for a couple of awkward seconds, unsure of what to say. So GUESS WHAT? NOW THE ONLY WAY THAT IT CAN BE DESCRIBED IS THROUGH SONG!

Music begins to play, and it shows our favorite Invader at Skool, staring nervously at a certain sweater-wearing girl. He begins to sing:

_(Verse 1): Skool day._

_See you there._

_Filthy pigs,_

_stumbling._

_Wanna say:_

_Love your hair!_

_Here I go, _

_mumbling._

_(Chorus): With my freeze ray,_

_I will stop _

_the world._

_With my freeze ray,_

_I will find the time_

_to find the words to_

_(Verse 2): Tell you how_

_how you make,_

_make me feel-_

_What's the phrase?  
><em>

_Like a fool,_

_kind of sick,_

_special needs._

_Anyway,_

_(Chorus): __With my freeze ray,_

_I will stop _

_the world._

_It's not a death ray,_

_or some other thing_

_I've done in this show._

_I just think you need _

_time to know that_

_(Bridge): I'm the guy_

_to make it real._

_The feelings you don't dare to feel._

_I'll bend the world __to our will,_

_and we'll make time stand_

_stiiiiiiiiiiiiill!_

_(Instrumental!)_

_(Verse 3): That's the plan,_

_rule the world,_

_you and me,_

_any day._

_Love your hair!_

"What?" Mabel asked.

"No, I uh, love the air. Heh." Zim laughed nervously, then continued with his song:

_With my freeze ray,_

_I will stop-_

All of a sudden, Gir walked in and intruded Zim's little song fantasy thing.

"Gir!" Zim said nervously. He then forgot that he left the video running, so he ended it quickly.

"I'z just chased a person! He waz runnin' round an' makin' loud screamin' noises like this!" the robot then began to scream very loudly. Zim covered his antennae.

"GIR!" Gir looked at Zim innocently.

"Yeeeeeesssssss?"

"Go upstairs and...do something while I work on my weapon."

"Okey dokey lokey!" Gir ran away to the top level to watch some T.V. Zim sighed, thinking about the nice girl with the sweaters and braces. He remembered how she helped him out on the playground of doom from the kids who were torturing him. Suddenly, he noticed that he got a message-from the Tallest! Quickly, he opened it, and was so excited to find out that if he succeeded in his mission, they would give him the ranking of the Top Invader **(A/N: Sorry for not adding the Bad Horse song in here, it just seemed a little too weird)**!

"This means everything!" Zim quickly grabbed some things, and went off outside to get a special part he needed in particular for his weapon.


	2. What an Irken's Gotta do

**Hey guys! Journal Sketch is back with even more HORRIBLENESS! MWAHAHAHAHAHAA!** **Also, I don't know why I'm announcing this, but I currently have the song ****_Awesome as a Wanna Be _****from My Little Pony: Equestria Girls 2 (or Rainbow Rocks. Whatevs.). I CAN'T STOP SINGING IT! SOMEBODY HELP ME! I mean, sure it's catchy, but it's kinda getting on my nerves.**

Meanwhile, on the busy sidewalks of the busted up city, the same girl with a colorful sweater and braces was standing all by herself, holding out tons of fliers in her hand. She was trying to build up a karaoke stadium, and so far was not having very much success. Most of the people who came her way just walked on, as if they didn't even know she existed. But that didn't stop this optimistic girl! She wore a friendly smile, and still continued, hoping that more people would donate.

**A/N: I know in the original, Penny (the girl that Mabel is playing the role of) sings in a sweet, kind of Fluttershy-ish way, and has that sort of personality too. But this is a parody, so just imagine the song being more upbeat and happy. Besides, she's not the only character that's making a huge change in the original.**

"_Would you please help support fun_

_for kids like me who need it?_

_You just have to sign your name,_

_don't even have to read it._

_Would you help?_

No? How about you?" Still everybody passed by without even giving her a glance. The cheerful girl sighed. Suddenly, Zim accidentally ran straight into her.

"OUT OF MY WAY, FILTHY-" Zim stopped when he saw that it was the girl that he was for some reason drawn to. His brain went dead, and he had no clue of what to say.

"Hi there! I'm Mabel!" the girl greeted. For a while Zim just stared, then he snapped out of it.

"Greetings, fellow hu-er-I mean...Mabel." Mabel giggled.

"You wanna sign one of these? They're to help build a karaoke stadium in the Skool! That way, things will be less bleh and more yay! I'm thinking of adding a party cannon of some sort, and tons of stickers, and-" Zim got lost with Mabel''s voice. She sounded like a nicer, more reliable, hardly annoying version of Gir. So pretty much the exact opposite of Gir. Zim smiled.

"-So, you wanna sign?"

"OF COURSE!" Zim grinned. He grabbed the pink glitter pen that Mabel offered to him and signed his name.

"Thankyouthankyouthankyou!" Mabel gave the green boy a crushing hug. As he was suffocating, a blush came across his face as the girl was squeezing herself to him. Once the hug was over, Zim was kind of disappointed.

"Say...don't I know you?" Mabel asked. Then she smiled. "I do! I never forget a face when I see one! You're in my class at skool!" Zim was stunned. This female...remembered him?

"Yes, you sit in the back of the class in bottom right corner." That was weird. Why was Zim starting to sound so...different?

"Wow! You must have amazing memorization skills! And your name...it's Zim, right?"

"YES! That is me! I am Zim!" Zim smiled and stood proudly, amazed that she knew his name.

"My brother talks about you sometimes. Normally he'd be with me, but he has...another friend now. I'm just all alone, and everybody thinks I'm a freak. I'm usually great at making friends, but everybody just seems to hate me." Mabel looked down and frowned for a bit, and then she put her grin back on like she hadn't ever said anything. Zim actually felt...sympathy for the human.

"Mabel-human, Zim requests that you be his...friend." The last time he used that word, things didn't turn out so well... Mabel's face beamed with joy.

"OF COURSE I'll be your friend, Zim!"

"Excellent..." Zim spoke in his dramatic deep voice.

"So, do you wanna come over to my house sometime? I'd recommend some of the local buildings around here, but they're not exactly the most ideal places for fun." Zim was about to answer, when suddenly he felt his device vibrating. He had completely forgot about his plan!

"Um...I have...things I need to do, Mabel, I have to go."

"But-"

"I HAVE THINGS TO DO!" and with that Zim ran off.

"Okay then." Mabel sighed.

Zim stopped running for a moment, thinking about Mabel.

"I can't believe she actually talked to me." Zim thought about going out with her. "Maybe I should-" NO. He had a mission, and he wasn't going to let his Tallest down. He grabbed his device, which kind of looked like a remote control. He started pushing on the controls, which made a nearby truck move, thanks to a little piece of machinery attached to the roof truck that Zim had put on earlier.

_"An Irkens gotta do_

_what an Irkens gotta do._

_Don't plan the plan_

_if you can't follow through._

_All that matters_

_is taking matters_

_into your own hands._

_Soon I'll control everything,_

_your wish is my __comman-"_

**A/N: Okay, if you've seen Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog, think of Captain Hammer. Now, think of the exact opposite of that. Now, think of that exact opposite person as Dib, and Captain Hammer being replaced by him. Just try to think of this next song as if Dib himself is singing it, with his persona and whatnot. The last thing I want to do is have Dib be like this huge adored full-of-himself idiot that always gets a happy ending.**

All of a sudden, Dib showed up, and jumped on top of the truck. He grabbed a tazor out of his trench coat, and destroyed the device on top of the vehicle.

**A/N: On second thought...I'm just not going to add Captain Hammer's songs in here. Making it sound like Dib is just...too much for me.**

Once he did that, Zim had no control of the truck! He tried frantically to stop it, but it was driving fast, disobeying its master. But that wasn't all, it got worse. Much to Zim's horror, the truck was headed straight for Mabel! He kept pushing the button the stop the van, but it was only in vain. However, Dib stood in front of the truck and pushed Mabel aside into a pile of garbage. One last time, Zim pushed the button, and stopped the car. He then rushed over to the scene to give Dib a good talking to.

"YOU FOOL! YOU COULD HAVE KILLED HER!"

"ZIM!" Dib glared at the Irken with hatred. "I knew this was another one of your plans! What are up to this time, huh? Well, I'm gonna put a stop to it!" the boy then began using the tazor on poor Zim, to the point where his disguise had completely come off and he was close to being unconscious. Suddenly, Mabel came out of the garbage, with a grin on her face because she hadn't really seen anything that had just happened. With the remaining bit of awareness Zim had, he scrambled and his behind the truck so that Mabel couldn't see who he really was.

_"Thank you Dib Membrane,_

_I don't think I can,_

_explain how important it was_

_that you stopped the van._

_I would be splattered,_

_I'd be crushed into debris._

_Thank you sir for saving me."_

And because Journal Sketch does not want to put Captains Hammer's songs in here like she has previously mentioned, she's just going to put the rest in non-singing mode!

"Don't worry about it." Dib gave a grin. Zim scowled with disgust, as he watched the two get closer, and look into each other's eyes like-

Zim gagged just a little bit. It was DISGUSTING! How could those two possibly be together?!

"I was the one that stopped the van! Me! Zim!" he said to himself. Horrified and traumatized by what he was seeing, he quickly grabbed the case of wonderflonium that he needed for his freeze ray. And walked off, full of hatred and envy of the stink-boy.

**I'm going to say it once: I've seen that some people ship Dib and Mabel, and I HATE IT! The main reason that I do is because Dib is so much like Dipper, it's almost like Pinecest! It's disgusting!**


End file.
